We’ve received several emails and phone calls inquiring as to the whereabouts of HC’s most famous dictator, Alex Rowland (AKA: Ra-Ra). Seems the dearth of commentary on Georgia’s political turmoil hasn’t gone entirely unnoticed, and for your concern we’re all truly gratified. Your prayers mean so much.
Rowland was abducted by a group of hillbillies (all of whom identify as dom tops) several weeks ago while climbing in the back-woods of Tennessee, though the ransom notes we’ve received (all dictated, not read, by Alex) have been very clear, no rescue requested. We’re all hoping he’ll get his fill & comes back to civilization very soon, though personally I think the hill people have bitten off a tad more than they can chew with this one. We here at Homo Cimbtastic headquarters (located in the world’s gayest bunker…you know, the one Lindsey Graham uses in case of emergency) are praying that Alex will wear them out eventually. Well, either that, or Alex’s ass hair will finally start growing back in & they’ll return him out of pure need for a good wax job.
a picture left by Alex's abductors. Poor Alex. Poor, poor Alex.
So keep him in your prayers, light a candle, and hopefully we’ll be seeing more from him in the very near future. And Alex, if you’re reading this, for Christ’s sake honey give those poor people a breather.
WHAT THE WHAT?! So after the amazing vibe of the summer trip, it was only natural to pay-it-forward. And really, you can’t stop a good thing, naaw what I’m saying?! Thus, we’re happy to announcing the growth of this amazing queer climbing network expand into 3 more cities and a clever new name for an established crew!
NEW NAME FOR L.A.: Top Out, Rock Bottom – LA LGBT Climbing
Still managed by our beloved CJB, the city of Angels crew is gonna be acting devilish at Clark’s Canyon very soon.
NEW GROUP BOSTON: Redpoint: Boston LGBT Climbers
Lead by our very own Jon who has moved to Boston to be a smhart kid at some school/thing called Harvard. With Rumney 2 hours away, be sure to see a lot of adventures in New England. In fact, here is a link to a Rumney event coordinated with New York City’s CRUX.
NEW GROUP ORLANDO: R.O.C. – Real Orlando Climbers
Our little medic, Taylor, is leading the Disney State through epic adventures. Climbing manatees, oranges, and Key Lime pie, this group is sure gonna shake the waters everglades!
VANCOUVER: Vancouver Queer Rock Climbers
Giulio, our bambino carino, our queer connection to Squampton and the Chief is growing this group on Canada’s Pacific coast. This group is hot off the press so stay tuned.
Our plan is working…grow! Grow! GROW!